Persistence Rules the Day

She reschedules/re-venues on me and I debate just throwing in the towel.
My sense of ego tells me to just say "fuck it" and move on down the road.
I'm confused and lost and just....tired, above all.

I know in my mind that I will arrive and some dude or dudes will be hawking over her and I just don't know if I have the balls or the nerve or the whatever-the-fuck to deal with all that noise. I don't know that I'll be able to pretend I don't care or hide my ire.

I remember a video I saw of Sasha Daygame where this hot girl told him she was testing him with a cockblock by her friend and by showing up late and was testing him to see how he'd react several other instances all along the way.
For some reason, this comes to me as I'm sitting in my room, debating if I'll go. I shower and get ready and make sure I look fucking good.

I decide to show up and I completely let go of my expectations. Furthermore, I accept it's already over and allow that to settle inside my chest.
I arrive and dance with several other girls.
Some guy takes a picture of her.
My stomach turns over but my visage belies no emotion.
She looks gorgeous but I don't let it resonate any deeper than in my eyes.

She comes over and I give her the most awkward friend hug I know how to give.
We talk and it's strange, and we dance and it's strange.....so she asks if we can talk.
I've completely let go and I see the car cross the double yellow lines and we're heading toward the guard rail.

I don't allow myself to hope this is anything other than the big blow off.
Midway through the conversation, I realize it's not necessarily that.
We've been miscommunicating and she wants this.
We dance a bit more, and some girls beeline for me and ask me to dance, but as we spin my eyes lock with hers and we both smile. The girl dancing with me dances close up to me but I'm not really aware of her. I'm holding this other moment tight in my chest because I know it is fleeting.
This guys follows her outside when I walk her out but he takes the hint and I kiss her goodbye.
I head home and sleep with a cautious bit of hope.