Playing the Numbers

I'm at *******.
A live band is playing ***** music.
I feel slightly out of place as I'm 2 years + removed from the scene. I recognize some long-time dancers.

I actually strike out the first two times I ask a girl to dance.
I know I am paying my dues and tithing the Gods watching overhead. They are testing my resolve.
I grow anxious, but I coach myself back into calm by acknowledging whatever reason the girls said no was nothing to let affect my inner state.
I also know that once I've danced and they see I know more than the basics things will fall into place.

I feel like a robot for doing this self-coaching inner monologue bullshit but it works, so fuck it.

Moments later an Indian girl asks me to dance.
I can only smile inside.
Awhile later, once girls have seen me dance, they view me differently.
And so it goes, another girl asks me to dance....and another....
The second girl tries to lead and I shake my head inside....there is only one captain of the ship. She thinks her sexy hip shaking-made-up-whatever-the fuck-sexuality is high value...instead it looks try hard and we dance less than one song b/c I don't hit on her or make conversation.

My legs are tired due to my time out of the scene.....but I head home, get **** and sleep hard and deep until I wake up to hit the gym and train.

The approaches and interactions continue. You can only roll snake eyes for so long.
You can only win what you put in the middle.

   - Yrs. in Christ