Tear You Apart

Monologue
Soundtrack

I'm sitting at my favorite coffee shop where I've warded off a million plus hangovers and where I wrote much of my first novel.
A gay guy nearby is staring me down b/c despite my hangover....I look pretty fucking hot, I have to admit. I can't even blame him.

I'm listening to Marilyn Manson and thinking about the past month.
I'm reminded of Anchorman, "well, that escalated quickly."

I woke up with 24 more dollars than I would have anticipated with my most hopeful of estimates pre drinking last night.

I kicked off the night with some Gin a friend gave me and got dressed to squeeze some blood from the massively overhyped rock that is NYE every fuckin' year.
We rolled down to see my buddy who was bartending. Left there, hit up another bar, hit up another bar, then rolled into a bar a friend of mine owns.

The pickings were slim to put it mildly.
In fact, it was the worst NYE selection I have ever fucking seen. Bitches lookin' beat and ratchet as fuck, straight up.
Which was fine, b/c honestly, I'm still sprung on this new vagina.
I could've just used some eye candy for some harmless flirting and conversation. I don't even remember the countdown to Midnight.
Seriously. For the first time since I was a kid it wasn't even worth marking or denoting.

But I know that I'm back in the fast lane now. I'm free and clear and I can only hope to vaguely control the beast.

You don't tell the dragon where to go....it takes you where it pleases.

Almost 2 years away from the leviathan.

I feel the maelstrom all around me. I feel the tremors in the ground as I take each step toward the black hole and I know there is nothing I can do to stop it.
There will be mascara streaming with tears and jaunts into the depths of debauchery.