Into the Void

"It occurred to me one evening...that a man can live on his wits and his balls for only so long. I'd been doing it for ten years and I had a feeling that my reserve was running low."
       - Hunter S. Thompson's The Rum Diary

When I was younger, and I wondered if life resembled art and/or film and people just woke up and they were 30 and looked around at their life surprised as fuck. This phase shift occurred while they were awake yet asleep and they woke up to find themselves a stranger in a strange land.

They woke up one day: married, with kids, and a job they hate living a few hours each weekend convincing themselves it was fulfilling and shit while they go down to their man cave for an hour of respite drinking a beer and they prefer sleep and a day with no expectations to sex.

Then one day I woke up and I was 30, working on my divorce, and starting over with not much to my name.

I look forward to the time after the coming famine in my life.
I know the simplified state of my life will be worth this time of tumult and discord (miss that blog).

I can say I haven't woken up surprised.
I always figured if I got married, especially the first time, it would end in divorce.
I wanted to give it a shot, experience it for myself, b/c I was always suspicious and in conversation there were always those who would remind me, "well, you haven't been married so how do you know?"
I typically countered with, "I don't need to be in a car wreck to know I don't want to experience it," but alas I have digressed (correct as I was).
Now, rather than theorize, I can speak from efficacy and experience.

You have to venture into the cave to appreciate the light, I suppose.