Things I hate Volume 1,875: Masturbatory Commencement Speeches

This post got me thinking.


I've sat in a number of commencement speeches.
The usual rabble, rabble, rah rah type of affair where everyone will go on to smashing success.

I always have a hard time not rolling my eyes and/or just walking the fuck out. Given my line of work it would be tantamount to suicide but nonetheless I have a hard time containing my rebuke on my face and in my posture.

3% is the truth.

I've quit most of the things I've ever started in my life.

Training/the gym and writing in one form or another (and my career until just recently) were the only 3 things I have ever consistently and virtually daily invested time in without pause.

**Womanizing gets an honorable mention on that list as well.

At any rate, the concept that we'll all sail off into the sunset on a magic carpet ride and have all the cal we want and pie too with rainbows jizzing jazz hands and applause over heads while we inhale lotus....is just that....a magic carpet ride.

You can only honestly be good at 2-3 things in your life.
Period.
That's it.




Anyone else who tells you otherwise is selling you something or wants you to do something to affirm what they are doing or because they don't like seeing someone else be really good at something.

The path to excellence is lined with doubt, fear, uncertainty, solitude, loneliness, and above all sacrifice.

It's the dinner parties, the movies, the sleeping in, the cookies, the TV shows, the video games, the sex, the fucking everything.

If you don't ascribe to the grind you are just spinning your wheels.
I hate speeches that like to simply look to the bright imaginary future of success and glory.

I want a speech where the speaker thanks themselves for being awesome and doing all the things others are unwilling to do and avoiding all the the things do in fact do.