(Mis)Truth

Before she even slips it into conversation I guess that she's a stripper.
I'm not gaming her so I speak my mind unfiltered.
I remark that we're all subconsciously looking for someone to help us recreate our childhood, that is, unless we do deliberate and perpetual work.

She asks what I read that she's looking for?
I tell her that she's a giver, a girl who dates narcissists, be they male or female because she's by and large a submissive.

She asks how I know and I tell her about her body language and verbalization(s) when we first met. S
She's in that zone people are in when someone tells them about themselves and it's not how they necessarily like to see themselves but they know it's true.
To her credit, she lets it go and embraces the truth of this interaction rather than get defensive and irritated as most people do.
Humbling experiences tend to enable people to do this.

We talk a bit more and she touches me at various times but she's a bit too shopworn for my tastes and I decide I won't sleep with her or pursue it.
I'm over the dating of girls who dance unless they're exceedingly hot...and even then, their lifestyle just isn't the best influence on mine.

We bullshit and various broken women check me out with the long stare but I'm unfazed and I don't crave anything other than my bed and my girl next to me. I'm in this strange purgatory that's unfamiliar. I sleep but not well and hit a meeting which helps and raw emotions well up because I see two people who went out recently and for a moment I touch their guilt, shame, and remorse.

I escape my concerns over my pending consequences and I sigh because I know the time of trial and tribulation is coming closer each passing day. There will be a moment of relief when it hits, followed by......

I stop obsessing over the future and I get lunch and coffee and I look out at the world and know that I am where I am as a result of my decisions and actions.
I'm on the spectrum investing in the future day by day....investing in a better future with my daily decisions driven by action.