Fresh Faced

I've told her where to meet me.
I'm sipping a beer as she walks up.
We talk and catch up on the weekend.
We head outside toward my car and we're on a side street.
I grab her by the arm, press her up against the car, and kiss her hard.
She wilts under the masculine pressure and she breathes a deep sigh of relief. Her world makes more sense in this moment and she can take a break from being independent and self-reliant. She tacitly fights it for a moment or two, but ultimately capitulates and it feels right.
This does not stop for an interminable length of time.

Her roommate is home and it's complicated and I vaguely consider where my girlfriend is but that thought proves fleeting.
Her fingers are tracing circles on my forearm and she looks up at me with that look that a young girl uses when she wants nothing more than for you to take her, make her, break her, and remold her.

I ease back on the throttle and she has to be up early as do I for some big meeting where I'll have to adroitly do some maneuvering to balance it all, and it's fine. We make plans and I bid her adieu and head off to meet some friends of mine but there's no good looking women because it's a something or other night and it's only club crawlers, DJ/bartender groupies, service industry chicks, and the like....and since I'm knee deep in options and I'm a bit older than I used to be, the pursuit is tiring and so despite the fact I look sharp and girls are giving me the indicators....I kill a beer and call it a night because I am tired as fuck from training and grinding at the gym and the like.

I drove home and listen to my favorite band and the night sky stretches on before me.
I see now that he is back in the driver's seat but he has changed. He's not self-destructive in the capacity that he once was.