Calm in the Calling

I'm reading.
I'm also pretty hungry if I'm being honest.
I've got enough gas to get home from the gym tonight, a meal worth of food at home and that's all life wrote for the time being.

I'm finding appreciation in my new Spartan-like existence and the focusing of my gaze on the gym and work.

Hit a wall with the new girl and honestly, I don't know that my feelings will return with any real intensity.

That moment...it always comes.
I get paid in a few days and I'll eat some real, good, delicious food for the first time in weeks.
I've been grinding in the gym, I need to square some bills and then it's back focused on the grind to get ready to compete again.

It's a calm time for a few days in the tumultuous life of post-separation/divorce and I'm not holding my breath for that to persist but I'll appreciate it will it resides with a calm finger on the barometer of emotional outbursts.

I've slacked off on my girl chasing and such due to money and the lack of desire that comes with virtually no drinking and temperance and the like.

I'm sitting in my favorite bookstore and there are families looking at kids' artwork. I see the jealous gaze of married dudes, dudes married to varying degrees of overweight women they no longer fuck which I can assume with near certainty b/c I was married not long ago and we'd all but stopped sleeping together.

Having seen the dark side of that arrangement....I shake my head, pack up my stuff, slip on my sunglasses and head to the gym.

Remember when I was married?

Wow.

Good luck and happy hunting.
I'll be out looking for some new vag this weekend.
Good luck and happy hunting,
      - Yrs. in Christ