The Predictable Post Of the Year

“Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious: both are disappointed.”
― Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

Some thoughts on Marriage from the trenches. I don't care if you've read this elsewhere in the manosphere, this is my blog and my personal thoughts based on my personal experience(s):

1 ) If you get married thinking the game(s) will end, you are sorely mistaken, my friend.
The stakes just get higher as does her willingness to try and jerk the leash.
If you do not retain control, she will fucking eat your soul until a pillaged and raped used condom of a husk remains.

2.a ) Things in my life have improved but I question how much is coupled with my sudden downgrade in drinking coupled with the approaching end of my 20's.
Fitzgerald scribed in The Great Gatsby that the end of the 20's was: "“Thirty--the promise of a decade of loneliness, a thinning list of single men to know, a thinning brief-case of enthusiasm, thinning hair.”

2.b ) I eat better, sleep more, experience likely less depression than before, but again, my drinking, diet, and sleep cycle were borderline psychotic during those times and would've driven a lesser man to suicide or depression medication I would think.That coupled with my choice in hobbies/sports, it's likely contact to the skull has made my behavior and moods more erratic than the average Bear.



3 ) Even if you change...it won't be enough. She will be torn between her rational brain thinking she wants you to change and the flipside of missing the excitement and drama you once provided. Her female brain will create drama and fights and the like to fill in that void. Men like me particularly find this difficult to grapple with: you tone it down, you finally cut back the drinking, but this means you have to cut it out nearly completely...and now she misses going out, dancing, getting wasted (and she misses the drunken tirades, the loud fights, the make-up sex, the part where you make her come back to you on your terms and not hers....no matter what she says, we all know based on women's actions what they actually want).....and now she will be bored.
A bored woman is always one thing: trouble (think military wives, think rich men's bored lonely housewives, think every stereotype about the pool boy and the divorcee).

- I used to drink virtually every single day. A good day was only 6 beers before sleep. Bad days were 12 or 14 beers before bed.
- Now, even though I'll go a week without a beer even with dinner, and have gone weeks without drinking at a time, when I do get drunk and act afool.....It's just like when I used to do it every weekend.
Change is never enough and it's not even the solution. It's been months since I got blackout drunk. It happened for the first time in months and you'd think it was the end of the world.

4 ) Sex will become less frequent. This will be on the part of one or both partners. But it will ALWAYS be the case. Period. I have never found an exception to this in my entire adulthood life despite having talked about this with untold numbers of men. Period. Disbelieve if you will.
This is the T-R-U-T-H.

5 ) At the end of the day, I think that like dating, for men with options, serial monogamy or a woman who tolerates the flings on the side is the route for men that simply have too many options or have conditioned their minds and bodies (dicks) to a variety of women.
    It is a fundamentally failed undertaking for a man who previously banged women and dated women and did so with concurrent women to think that he will manage long term monogamy without descending into mindnumbing and soulcrushing boredom.
If the man succeeds in eradicating those urges from himself, he barely resembles if at all the man he was previously. And often, he will find his wife on some level loses interest/respect/desire for him.
----

You will always be castigated for making up your own rules.
But, most, if not virtually everyone I see is unhappy. So following the rules they are following is a fool's errand. Unless I want what they have.
P.S. - I don't.

You're real role will become the following:
You live your peaceful married man life and she harps about something.
You ignore it b/c fuck small shit like the fact that you don't like shopping for stuff online.
You never fucking liked it before you were married, why would you now?
She flips out and complains that now that you're married this should change. You get mad b/c you were always this way.

OR
You get wasted and act afool. You have toned this down quite a bit. In fact, you rarely act this way anymore.
She always knew this.
You've changed, but it's not enough.

You resent her and feel like the effort you've made to change is fucking wasted b/c you know and see and feel that it will never be enough. And if it's ever enough...she'll be bored.


No matter what a woman says...she expects long term, that you will act how she thinks she wants you to act.
If you are not willing to engage in this perpetual battle or just want to spend your energy on other things....don't get married.

Welcome to marriage.
    - Yrs. in Christ